Breathe it out – “Me, too!”

I read somewhere recently that some of the most powerful words in the English language are, “Me, too!” ( I think it was in Carry On, Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton).  I must say I wholeheartedly agree!  What other combination of words can make us feel like we are not totally abnormal and that someone has our back?

It’s like permission to breathe…

When we say, “Me, too,” the exhale seems to take a little longer and empty those lungs full of panic and fear and aloneness.

Just imagine that you’re talking to someone, and she says,” I struggle with (fill in the blank),” and your eyes light up, lock on hers and you say, “ME, too!!” ( did you feel ’em empty?)  What a relief.  Your heart leaps and your shoulders feel lighter and you feel soul-connected.

You + Me = Connection. (I don’t know about you, but THAT’S my kind of math!)

In order for us to build community we must be vulnerable. Oh, what a scary place to be – so exposed and raw – like an antelope with no escape from a lion:

… what if she laughs at me?

…what if she really does think I’m a weirdo?

…what if she tells my friends and they all look at me differently?

…what if they leave me?

I am learning that there is power in vulnerability.  There is power in the shared hurts and soul-sinking feelings. There is power in the soul-connection.  We are not alone. Each one of us has something that crushes our spirit, something that squeezes the joy from daily living, something that keeps us from being free.

Here’s the kicker – each one of us can change that.  We can have a do-over at any point in the day.  Yep – as I tell my daughter, you can turn it around right now.

If you feel alone, spirit-crushed, or even just a bit quirky , that’s ok.  I urge you to take a chance in the next week and share it with someone -a close friend, a mentor, a pastor – or even with me.  I promise I won’t laugh or criticize (cross my heart).

It takes guts to be vulnerable.  I am convinced the most helpful encouragement comes from someone who has traveled that same path…..but we won’t find her if we don’t peel back a layer or two and expose our insecurities.

Our walls have served their purpose.  They protected our hearts, or so we thought.  It’s time for us to tear them down, brick by brick, layer by layer.  Our soul-connections are out there. God will be with us as we learn to let go and let Him handle the details.

My go-to is The Serenity Prayer in times of confusion.  It’s amazing what perspective it brings.  I urge you to give it a try – you may have to say to several times,  but  I can assure you, it is a powerful meditation of acceptance and release.  By the grace of God we go…

This is where the REAL changes happen, my friends

I’ll go first.  My name is Kristin and I am a grateful member of Al-Anon, a mommy-tantrum thrower, uncertain mama of a kiddo with unique needs and anxiety-sufferer.  I get overwhelmed easily and need my space and time to regroup or I am a wound up ball of tangled string – yet I always try to fill my schedule and I fell like I am always busy. I am trying to make more time for spiritual whitespace and let Him guide me because I can’t do this alone.

Care to join me?

Psst….Guess what y’all? “Me, too!”

I am so excited and filled with gratitude to be linking up with fellow writers (in)couraging writers today.  Come check us out!

Voice – where are you?!

Finding my voice is more challenging than I had anticipated. I set out on this blog writing journey to find it and let it shine. I thought for sure that God had impressed upon my heart to write about the ups and downs of my life so I can let others know they’re not alone in their struggles.

Don’t try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It’s the one and only thing you have to offer. – Barbara Kingsolver

I read all these amazing blogs, and these women seem to write with such ease and grace. I feel like a songbird trying to belt out a tune and instead I croak like a frog! It’s somewhere in here – but it’s not coming out how I had planned.

I guess it goes back to letting go and letting God. I keep trying to take too much control of things and force them, when I need to step back, read my Bible, devotionals, and Al-Anon literature, absorb them and then let it flow…like stream of consciousness…like a journal…like now.

I had a conversation with my sponsor last night about control ( see, I am still on Step One – and that’s okay – even though I want to move forward- I am not really ready ); and, I think I can handle it all, like a superhero, and I just keep adding and adding more and more to my plate – lessening a lot of time to focus on self-care. I fill my life with business because, subconsciously, don’t feel like I’m worthy enough to spend my time on. Now, I know that intellectually I can and should spend time to reflect, recharge and regroup- but it’s the execution of it that presents the underlying problem.

My days are full, and for that, I am grateful. Yet, I need to manage my time more effectively and learn to make time every day to, reflect, recharge and regroup.

 

Just 3 Simple Steps , yet we all know that the airplane pilots tell the adults to do if in an emergency situation– put your mask on first so you can help your children ( because without us, they’re left floundering – figuratively and hopefully not literally). Well, every day might not be an emergency – but what do we do when faced with one? We have to lay that foundation so we can get stronger emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically. It’s okay to ask for that time, too. We need to reflect, recharge & regroup with God on a daily basis.

Take a walk or run in the beautiful outdoors – maybe spend some time with some 4-legged creatures.

Read your Bible, engage in your bible studies or absorb other spiritually encouraging writings.

Watch a funny TV show (our family favorite is “The Big Bang Theory” – it never fails to get us rolling!!)

Talk with a mentor.

Grab coffee with a friend or go out on a date with your spouse.

I recall my pastor saying that we actually need to focus on our health so we are “prepared to do the work that God has planned for us.”

Wise words…

A house requires a solid foundation on which to sit – before it gets all the beautifiers and windows and in which to let the light shine. Well, we need the same, except we need to allow the light in so we can let it shine out – that’s our role here on earth.

I need to re-set my foundation. It’s not going to be perfect, but it’s going to be what I need to stay sane on a daily basis. And the guilt? I’m not going to let that little gremlin take up lifetime residency – I’m kickin’ him out (even if it‘s piece by piece!) – Ha!

It’s in there, I know it is… ( I just have to know where to look for it)